During Lents we will also continue our tradition of joining together for Soup and Sandwich suppers from 5:30 PM to 6:16 PM, followed by our Lenten worship services from 6:30 PM to 7 PM:

February 28^th – Ash Wednesday: The Remedy for Sin

March 4: Ungodliness and Unthankfulness

March 11: Anxiety, Frustrations, Discontent

March 18 Pride and Selfishness

March 25: Impatience, Irritability, and Anger

April 1: Envy and Jealousy

Early on, I had asked my mother whether she thought Down syndrome happened because of sin in the world. She responded gently, “The only evidence of sin I see is in how the world reacts to Penny.” I began to understand what she meant—that Penny is no more or less human than I am, no more or less born in sin, no more or less blessed, no more or less in need of redemption. When I think of Penny’s life to come only in terms of being fixed or healed, I miss the point of what it means for God to redeem and heal each and every one of us. ……..

I can’t say what Penny’s redemption will look like, and I trust that God’s promise to make each one of us whole will include physical transformation. But part of the point is to remind ourselves about the full humanity of those with Down syndrome in this world. It took a lot of thought and prayer for me to agree with what my mother understood as soon as Penny was born: The evidence of sin is in our response to her, not in her extra chromosome.

For a long time, I was looking for answers to questions that were hardly worth asking, and I was trying to recreate my daughter according to a cultural standard of normalcy rather than according to a biblical understanding of full human life. We are created in the image of God, recipients of divine love and grace, and we bear the responsibility and privilege of extending love into the world here and now, and forever more.

Two and a half years after Penny was born, I don’t think of her as defective, or retarded, or abnormal. I think back to that first evening of her life, when I cringed at the words about the baby next door: “She’s perfect!” I still wouldn’t call Penny perfect. I wouldn’t call any human being, besides Jesus, perfect. I am well aware that Penny needs healing and redemption through Christ, as do I. And Penny’s nature, I hope and pray, will be redeemed through Christ as she becomes the whole person she was created to be. I suspect Penny’s whole person will include three twenty-first chromosomes, but only because any aspect of that extra chromosome causing separation—physical, emotional, relational—will be overcome.

Questions: How would you describe the “perfect child” or the “normal child” or the “good kid”? What standards are you using to measure “perfection”, “normalcy”, and “goodness”? What standards do you use to define “quality of life”? To what extent do your standards reflect God’s standards? 

Read Matthew 7:2: What implications do Jesus’ words have for how you evaluate others?

Read Ephesians 2:1-10:  How should God’s work of salvation change the way we look at ourselves and others?

• Pray and ask others to pray. 
• Support your church if it works through church discipline with one of your children. 
• Keep a relationship with your son or daughter if at all possible. 
• Do not make the sin the central issue of every conversation. 
• Don’t make provision for the sin. 
• Don’t enable the sin. 
• Grow your own marriage. 

You can read an expanded discussion of each point HERE.

Matthew 11:19

As soon as Jesus Christ, being born in the likeness of sinful flesh, has come to years of maturity, and has commenced his real life-work, he at once discloses his friendship for sinners by associating with them. You do not find him standing at a distance, issuing his mandates and his orders to sinners to make themselves better, but you find him coming among them like a good workman who stands over his work; he takes his place where the sin and the iniquity are, and he personally comes to deal with it. He does not write out a prescription and send by another hand his medicines with which to heal the sickness of sin, but he comes right into the lazarhouse [note: this was an old-fashioned word for a hospital, particularly for lepers], touches the wounded, looks at the sick; and there is healing in the touch; there is life in the look. The great Physician took upon himself our sicknesses and bare our infirmities, and so proved himself to be really the sinner’s friend.

Some people appear to like to have a philanthropic love towards the fallen, but yet they would not touch them with a pair of tongs. They would lift them up if they could, but it must be by some machinery, some sort of contrivance by which they would not degrade themselves or contaminate their own hands. Not so the Savior.  Up to the very elbow he seems to thrust that gracious arm of his into the mire, to pull up the lost one out of the horrible pit and out of the miry clay. He takes himself the mattock and the spade, and goes to work in the great quarry that he may get out the rough stones which afterwards he will himself polish with his own bitter tears and bloody sweat, that he may make them fit to shine for ever in the glorious temple of the Lord his God. He comes himself into direct, personal contact with sin, without being contaminated with it. He comes as close to it as a man can come. He eats and drinks with sinners. He sits at the Pharisee’s table one day, and does not rise because there is a crowd of people no better than they should be coming near him. Another day he goes to the publican’s house, and the publican had, no doubt, been a great extortioner in his time; but Jesus sits there, and that day does salvation come to that publican’s house.

From a sermon entitled "The Sinner’s Friend," by Charles Haddon Spurgeon (1834-1892)

We are all hard to love
Learning to love difficult people starts with understanding that you  (like me) are hard to love too. You might not be difficult to love in the same way as those around you are, and you may not cause the same amount of relational damage; but on the inside, in your own way, you’re just as difficult to love as everyone else.

Just like those difficult people, you and I sin and go astray (Isaiah 53:6,  Romans 3:22 -23). It took Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross for God to welcome you and me into his family area God doesn’t love you because you make such a wonderful addition to its family; he loves you in spite of what you are like. And through his love for you, he changes you to be like himself. He makes you lovely, even though you didn’t start out lovely (2 Corinthians 5:17-1. You need exactly the same things from God — grace, mercy, kindness, and welcome — that others need from you.

If deep down you know you are lovable and God’s acceptance of you is completely undeserved, then you will have a welcoming attitude toward other unlovely people. But if you believe you’re basically a decent person who anyone would be privileged to know, then you won’t welcome others until they get their act together and become decent… just like you!

Learning the difficult skill of loving difficult people start asking God to show you how hard you are to love. When he answers your prayer, ask him to forgive you. Then because you have been forgiven for so much, you will be able to share the grace you have received with others (Luke 7:47)

from How to Love Difficult People: Receiving and Sharing God’s Mercy by William P. Smith

To see a person a sinner then, is not to see him or her as hypocritical, disgusting, or evil. Most sinners are very nice people. To call a man a sinner is not a blast at his manners or his morals. It is a theological belief that the thing that matters most to him is forgiveness and grace.

If a pastor finds himself resenting his people, getting petulant and haranguing them, that is a sign that he or she has quit thinking of them as sinners who bring "nothing in themselves of worth" and has secretly invested them with divine attributes of love, strength, compassion, and joy. They, of course, do not have these attributes in any mature measure and so will disappoint him or her every time. On the other hand, if the pastor rigorously defines people as fellow sinners, he or she will be prepared to share grief, shortcomings, pain, failure, and have plenty of time left over to watch for signs of God’s grace operating in this wilderness, and then fill the air with praises for what he discovers.

An understanding of people as sinners enables a pastoral ministry to function without anger. Accumulated resentment (a constant threat to pastors) is dissolved when unreal- that is, untheological- presuppositions are abandoned. If people are sinners then pastor’s can concentrate on talking about God’s action in Jesus Christ instead of lamenting how bad the people are. We already know they can’t make it. We already have accepted their depravity. We didn’t engage to be pastor to relax in their care or entrust ourselves to their saintly ways. ‘Cursed be he that trusteth in man, even if he be a pious man, or perhaps, particularly if he be a pious man.’ (Reinhold Niebuhr) We have come among the people to talk about Jesus Christ. Grace is the main subject of pastoral conversation and preaching."

From Eugene Peterson, The Contemplative Pastor

Bible Study

Someone in the crowd said to him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” Jesus replied, “Man, who appointed me a judge or an arbiter between you?” Then he said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions.” Luke 12:13-15

Read Genesis 3: 1-13. When God confronts Adam and Eve after they sinned how do they react? In what ways does this pattern of behaving repeat itself in our society and even in our daily lives as individuals?

Read Genesis 37:1-24. what kind of behaviors do Joseph’s brothers engage in and how do these behaviors fan sibling jealousy into a murderous plot. In what kinds of situations do you find yourself engaging in the same behavior?

Read Psalm 73:21-22. How does this text help us understand why Jesus so forcefully responded to the question from the upset sibling with the command watch out!

Read Luke 12:15 and Matthew 7:1-5. What is Jesus telling us to do when we see someone else sin? Does Jesus forbid us to challenge others? Under what circumstances should we go to a brother or sister in Christ and confront them?

Read Luke 12:15, Matthew 15:18-19, James 4:1-3, and Ezekiel 36:25-27. What is required for us to experience genuine reconciliation and lasting change?

Martin Luther comments on the issue idols of the heart in his discussion of the First Commandment in the Large Catechism:

Thou shalt have no other gods before Me.
That is, you are to regard me alone as your God. What does this mean, and how is it to be understood? What does “to have a god” mean, or what is God? Answer: A “god” is the term for that to which we are to look for all good and in which we are to find refuge in all need. Therefore, to have a god is nothing else than to trust and believe in that one with your whole heart. As I have often said, it is the trust and faith of the heart alone that make both God and an idol. If your faith and trust are right, then your God is the true one. Conversely, where your trust is false and wrong, there you do not have the true God. For these two belong together, faith and God. Anything on which your heart relies and depends, I say, that is really your God.

Of course many of you will remember Luther’s more succinct discussion of the issue of idolatry in the Small Catechism:

The First Commandment.Thou shalt have no other gods.

What does this mean?–Answer.We should fear, love, and trust in God above all things.

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Here are some gospel questions to ask ourselves:

1. What is my greatest nightmare? What do I worry about most?
2. What, if I failed or lost it, would cause me to feel that I did not even want to live? What keeps me going?
3. What do I rely on or comfort myself with when things go bad or get difficult?
4. What do I think most easily about? Where does my mind go to when I am free? What pre-occupies me?
5. What prayer, unanswered, would make me seriously think about turning away from God?
6. What makes me feel most self-worth? What am I the proudest of?
7. What do I really want and expect out of life? What would really make me happy?
8. What position of authority do I desire to give me a sense of power?
9. Whose opinion of me do I hold so dear that if lost I would be undone?
10. What type of financial loss or gain would change my sense of security?
11. What one criticism would cause me to respond in anger (wife, children, work, ministry, family, friends, etc.)? What am I most touchy about when brought to my attention?
12. If I had ______________, then I’d be truly happy and feel as if my life has meaning and value.
13. If I lost ______________, I would be undone.
14. I’m impatient because I’m ____________.
15. I’m critical because I’m _____________.
16. I’m angry because I’m _____________.
17. I’m unhappy because I’m ____________.
18. I’m in despair because I’m ____________.
19. I have hope because I’m ___________.
20. I feel worthy because I’m ___________.

By pursuing this idol you are saying to God, "Jesus is not enough. I also need ______ to be happy."

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You can read the rest of the article by going HERE.

Preachers will always be tempted to bypass the problem behind the problems: captivity to sin, bondage to the accusations of the demonic powers, the sentence of death. That’s why so many of our Christian superstars smile at crowds of thousands, reassuring them that they don’t like to talk about sin. That’s why other Christian celebrities are seen to be courageous for fighting their culture wars, while they carefully leave out the sins most likely to be endemic to the people paying the bills in their congregations.

Where there is no gospel, something else will fill the void: therapy, consumerism, racial or class resentment, utopian politics, crazy conspiracy theories of the left, crazy conspiracy theories of the right; anything will do. The prophet Isaiah warned us of such conspiracies replacing the Word of God centuries ago (Isaiah 8:12-20). As long as the Serpent’s voice is heard, “You shall not surely die,” the powers are comfortable. [Genesis 3:1-4]

Jeremiah Wright’s pronouncements are tragic. But they are tragic not just because of what he said, but where he said it. He was standing in the place of Jesus, but channeling Che Guevara. Change the channel and you will find a smiling, non-threatening, pro-America preacher, also standing in the place of Jesus, but he’s channeling Ayn Rand or M. Scott Peck or Peter Drucker.

The answer to both is to preach Christ, and him crucified. Where the gospel is preached, the whole story of Scripture as it is summed up in Jesus Christ, people will find authenticity and wholeness and, yes, liberation—and will do their best to extend that liberation to others. Maybe that’s why the most vital Christianity is increasingly found in Africa, with believers too pinned in by Islamic persecution to fall for mammon worship, whether of the covetous revolutionary or jealous consumerist kinds.

I read a lot of books on marriage and one of the best I have ever come across is the recently published work by Dave Harvey entitled When Sinners Say “I Do”: Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage. This is not really a book for someone who wants to learn better communication or problem solving techniques, although I am fairly certain that anyone who embraces the lessons of the book will end up communicating better and resolving differences in a more thoughtful manner. The strength of this book is that it focuses on how the Gospel of Jesus Christ can transform our lives and relationships.  In the book’s foreword Paul David Tripp when he writes,:

“This book grasps at the core drama of every married couple. This drama is no respecter of race, ethnic origin, location, or period of history. It is the one thing that explains the doom and hope of every human relationship. It is the theme that is on every page of this book in some way. What is this drama? It is the drama of sin and grace.”

One of my favorite quotes from the author focuses on mercy and forgiveness.

In the Bible, mercy weds the severe obligation of justice with the warmth of personal relationship. Mercy explains how a holy and loving God can relate to sinners without compromising who he is. God doesn’t thump his chest and parade this attribute, as if it’s unique to him but unattainable by us. He gives it to us freely, a gift to pass along. “Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful” (Luke 6:36). . . . This also raises some important questions for sinners who say “I do.” Do you know God as a God of mercy? Do you see your spouse as God sees him or her–through the eyes of mercy?

This book will be blessing to people at every stage of life..from singles to couples married for many years.

Read the Discerning Readers book review by clicking HERE.

You can order the book and find links to the table of contents, foreword, and preface in PDF format by clicking HERE

You can watch the author Dave Harvey summarize his book, chapter by chapter on YouTube by clicking HERE

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PS..For those who just want to learn communication and problem solving techniques I recommend that you go straight to the best martial researcher alive today, John Gottman, and read The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work or Ten Lessons to Transform Your Marriage. However, I want to remind you that we always need to hear the message of divine mercy.  Gottman may be able to teach you how to have a stable and happy marriage but you would still be lost in sin without the Gospel. Only God is able to bring our hearts alive: “And I (God) will give you a new heart, and a new spirit I will put within you. And I will remove the heart of stone from your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. Ezekiel 36:26